BiddiesInMyBrain

Beautiful Day

While today is not generally a holiday I celebrate, it has been a lovely day just the same. Thank goodness, because it follows on the heels of a miserable evening, both from the torrential downpours of yesterday's weather, and the downpours of my soul. I have been sorrowful about many things locally, and they collapsed on me last night. Better left unsaid here, too.

But, when Crash woke me up early this afternoon, it was to a gorgeous, sunny day - blue skies, bare branches, birds singing in the crisp air - just a perfect, cold December day. We had opened presents just after he had returned home from playing at our church and at a Midnight Mass at one of the Catholic churches here in the city, and I was simply overwhelmed by the thought put into the gifts from my dad and stepmom. I feel so very, very blessed to have them both in my life. I looked at them again in the sunlight - especially the sparkly one - and just smiled all over inside and out. Later on, Crash and I watched UP - one of his gifts to me - and I cried in all the sappy parts (once again - as I knew I would). Crash had never seen it, and loved it - I am so glad. We scooted the easy chairs as close together as they would go and just held hands through the movie... it was just so gentle and sweet. :::smile::: It's been a good day.

Tomorrow starts the work of clearing the attic. Up and down and up and down the attic steps - which frighten me. I will be going to visit a local artisan first to see about some earrings, but then will come home and work, work, work. That attic is a nightmare.

Next week begins work on the dissertation in earnest; so much to be done on the Ghent paper, which requires a great deal of prep work on materials I already have in-house. So, a lot of data-entry for me beginning next week. But I am looking forward to learning more and more about this city and how it developed. So fascinating.

Not much else to say. Just happy about today and taking it easy.

Happy holidays to all - happy new year... happy anything you celebrate.

Celebrate yourself.

Pretending

I am pretending I am not wrestling with another bout of insomnia after a glorious two-day run of blissful sleep. Nope, this hot toddy (with more toddy than tea) is just for effect! Ahhhhhh.... yes.... to polish off the last of the Jack Daniels with a lovely cuppa.... and MAYBE, just MAYBE to get some sleep again as a result? One can hope.

Am plotting and planning the ins and outs of my revised paper for Ghent. Can't help it - I am so very excited about it, and now I think I have a VERY cool idea for something additional to apply to it. Top secret, you understand, totally under wraps for a little while longer - but really cool if it pans out. I learned so much this summer in Michigan from Dr. Margo Anderson - if only she knew what a lasting impression she has made on me! I can only hope to live up to her standards. And mine. And those of Dr. Esra Ozdenerol's, too. Phew. Tall orders.

Been addressing cards to friends and family all over the world the past several days (finally found my Moleskin(TM) address book) - it will be a wonder to get them out in time! I'll be thrilled to send them, though; we haven't done a holiday card in more than four years... not since I have been working on my doctorate, I don't think. Wow. Yeah. A lot has changed. We wrote a letter... and managed to fit in a lot of good things for this year... and a couple of the low points... but really, it's been a very good year for both of us when we look back on it. A year to be proud of, frankly, despite the personal setbacks (mainly mine, mainly healthwise). It's nice to have a good year for a change. We've had so many downright crappy ones in a row that this one isn't bad to have!

Am getting quite excited about going to Ghent and the European Social Science History Conference... especially now that I have downloaded Google Earth and have been exploring Belgium from above (and Amsterdam, since that may be a layover...). What a terrifically neat country!! I mean - I have been looking at the guidebooks... but to be able to move around the cities and stop and look like this is AMAZING. I am so addicted to Google Earth now ... and it's creating a problem with getting me to step away from the computer! ::chuckle::

Also in Google Earth, I have been playing with old haunts from my childhood... and my is it bringing back memories. Old addresses as far back as I can remember, all sorts of things. Zooming right on in. Wow. Neat-o!

Been reading good books lately. Read Sarah Vowell's latest: The Wordy Shipmates late last week, and am now in the middle of Howard Blum's American Lightning, which has me thoroughly engrossed; that one will take me one more evening at most. Then what? Hmmmmmm... more grading, I am sure... but wow... I have time for some optional reading, and I am taking advantage of it.

Tomorrow's a busy day: first thing run to the credit union, then the pharmacy, then a couple errands, then lunch, then a doc appointment, then zoom to Target, then to the University while a friend borrows my car, then picked up after she is done, then HOME FINALLY. WHOOSH. Then grade papers until they are done, record them. Create the exams for the two different classes taking exams this week... and then ... well... poop out. Maybe watch a movie with Crash?? He would like that.

Perhaps by then I will be tired enough to actually sleep tomorrow night. Wouldn't that be loverly?? Because Tuesday's going to be no better... Especially with a run to another doc first thing in the morning, then the University in the early afternoon, likely for the whole mid-afternoon and evening... and then get picked up by Crash or Sasa late... and then hit the ground running on the grading; all my grading for that class MUST be done - including the tallying and recording of the final grades on the Registrar's website - by no later than Wednesday night. Why? Because I have another class on Thursday that will need the same thing... and they must have their final grades tallied and recorded to the Registrar no later than Friday night. It's going to be a real fight to the finish. Saturday noon is the absolutely deadline set by the University... and I intend to be nowhere near it. They used to give us over the weekend until Monday noon... Bah on whomever changed the semester calendar to end this way!!

But, once Saturday is over... things are ... OVER! I will be my own person for roughly four weeks. I will have a great deal to do - oh and how! - but I will be able to do it on a schedule I make, pretty much. Hoorah! I do have a honey-do list and a me-do list... but if we don't accomplish all the things on them, I won't stress... there's always summer. And insomniac nights! :::chuckle:::

Well, I am going to give sleep another shot. The alarm is set to go off in 3 1/2 hours... and that's going to be a bit grim. More than a bit grim. C'mon hot toddy. Kick in!

Feeling My Way Along

It's been an up-and-down week, strange in and of itself.

Oddly, the feelings have been more ones of let-down than ecstasy ... not at all what I expected. But looking at it from this perspective, I realize that I have been living, eating, breathing comprehensive exams for 12 solid months and to suddenly be lifted of them is a bit of a shock to the system.

So, I have been in turns sleeping deeply and playing the incurable insomniac. So strange. In talking with other ABDs, I come to find that this is not uncommon and has the distinct potential to continue for up to a month afterward. I sincerely hope not; I have much to accomplish, though I am planning to take a week off to do nothing but things I enjoy that have NOTHING to do with school work at all.

One of the things I did (see above) is to decorate outside a wee bit; I put 144 little red bows on the runt of a redbud tree (which we have dubbed Wilbur, after the dear piglet in Charlotte's Web) in our front yard. I managed to sunburn my face but good... but it was well worth it. The tree is cute and brightens the neighborhood by day.

Been writing holiday cards the past two days, too... the first time in years. THAT feels good. I have been too exhausted to do that for so long at this time of year, and to actually write a holiday letter, address cards, sign them and (I hope) get them out the door this week will be a coup. 

I have been on a shredding binge of late, too... more than 200 gallons of shredded material so far... I am just bound and determined to rid the house (and the attic... oh my... that godforsaken attic. I had no idea just how much JUNK was up there!) of all this paperwork and mess that has accumulated while I have been in school. Not only that, but I am astounded by how much junk mail we get every single day from various sources even though we are on do not solicit lists. Unreal. We are upending bag upon bag of shreds into the mulch piles along with leaves and other garden material to break down for spring mulch... it's all to the good. I think we are going to end up with more than 700 gallons - maybe even much more than that - of mulched shreds, and probably two or three mulch piles - by the time all is said and done. To the right is just eight bags of shreds (104 gallons). Barely the tip of the iceberg.

The attic is also a wasteland of books and miscellaneous other things I had no idea even still existed in my life. Um. Come the end of break they may no longer exist in my life, either. European history books? Will go to good homes among colleagues (except for those near and dear to me)... and much of the rest? Shredded, off to Goodwill, off to the church for the auction, or simply OUT. I am ready to divest of a lot of stuff. It is time.

There is much grading to be done tomorrow and Monday first, however, and then Tuesday through Friday is nothing but a marathon of grading in order to get grades turned in before the University deadline of Saturday noon. This will be a bit of a grueling week. But, unlike this time last year, I will not have any work of my own to turn in, too. That helps.

But tonight? I have some time to simply be. It's raining and icky outside, but warm and together with my honey inside. I think I will go enjoy it. It's been far too long since I have been able to make that choice. May your evening be as bright!

There's No Going Back

Well, I've gone and done it. I've taken my comprehensive exams - written and oral - and as of yesterday, I have managed to go ABD (all but dissertation) in my PhD program. I am a newly-minted late doctoral student!! This means that, if all goes well and according to the plan I have laid out, I will be Dr. Laura Perry in May 2011.

I cannot begin to describe the relief I am feeling at this point. I am done doing work which is completely and utterly outside of my field of study (I hope). From now on, I will, if all works out, be able to work entirely in American History and Geographic Information Systems; I am done with coursework and am on to the dissertation. Most of us look forward to this moment for the entire course of study - this means we have basically gained the confidence of our mentors and are ready to move on to the whole reason we entered PhD work to begin with - our own work. What interests us. What we hope will interest other people enough to hire us in the future (and gain us book contracts, and etc.)

The next step? The prospectus... the delivery of the tentative dissertation title, thesis, outline, major works cited, and plan of attack... to the department. Then, after approval, CHARGE! In my case, I have already been working on the dissertation in parts for some time, so the prospectus should, in many ways (not all) be boiler plate. And, I already gave a basic prospectus this summer as part of my program in Michigan. This is a very, very good thing (thank you, Margo!).

Then, the grunt work of researching and writing. But this is the work I love. While I am allergic to book dust and mold (What on earth? I am a historian after all! How unfair!) this is my very favorite part. Well, I also love the writing, too. But, I love the uncovering of sources... it's just like a miner must feel... except that every scrap of paper holds something, even if it is not relevant to *my* topic. It is interesting on its own merits; I am always learning more and more just by thumbing through. EVERYTHING is educational, even if it is not going to inform my topic.

In the midst of this, I am writing a paper to take with me to Ghent, Belgium. I have it in rough form now, but it needs revision and work over break - and it is a major part of my dissertation. I'll be busy with it for several weeks in December and January. There will be some accelerated research in there so I can get a paper submitted quickly. Revisions can come later, but they need the paper in-hand soon.

After a year of researching and writing (in my case), I will pull together my dissertation into a strong rough draft - chapters will already have been circulated and (I HOPE) approved piece by piece in the interim... but the whole should begin to really pull together this time next year or a little later. I plan do defend in the early spring and graduate in May... this is a VERY tight schedule, but without any other major distractions, I think I can do it. I don't have children, and I do have the ability to sit here and focus. And I have supportive, confident friends. This is so key.

Anyway, this is the basic outline to my plan. I have most of my major data already pulled together and in-house - the advantage of already working on it in pieces for three and a half years. I still have quite a bit of reading and research to go; I have accumulated a lot of data and materials, but much of it is as yet unread, or not thoroughly analyzed. It's going to take a lot of time and focus. BUT, the big advantage is that I have it here. Right here. In house. I don't have to leave and run to archives all over the United States all the time to get the data (and THANK GOODNESS for Google Books!!). There are two major archives I have yet to visit, yes, but one is within the state, and the other can wait for next year - if it is needed at all (I may be able to omit it - I don't know). 

The next step. Well, we'll take it as it comes. For now, I am focusing on the PhD. That's it. 

But hallelujah. The dang comps are over and today is the start of a new leaf in my life's book. Onward and upward! The dissertation awaits!

Laura